FREE
HEROIN
Issue 2 written 2000 |
Picture
this. Me in the airing cupboard with a defiltered embassy No.1 with a
damp rizla wrapped around it and a damp towel over my head.
In a perfect world most addicts believe they would not need prescriptions
because prohibition would not exist (and genetically engineered opium
poppies/coca leaves would grow in Elysian fields behind the cannabis factory).
An attempt to access further specialised know-how via the pharmacists
of the Swiss heroin trial got no further than 'This is the property of
the Swiss Government'. The accepted wisdom on diamorph reads; base formulations
(brown, scag) oily; good for smoking. Hydrochloride (white, no.4) refined,
for reasons associated with its behavior under comparable temperatures
is a preparation better suited to injecting or snorting. One thing is
for sure, diamorphine hydrochloride is not really a smoking formulation
and diamorphine base is very difficult to acquire from commercial pharmaceutical
companies. The question of the Evans/McFarlanes two stage monopoly will
appear in a later edition of Black Poppy.
There
is an enduring problem (my second difficulty) around finding dose levels.
You remember that scene in 'Oliver', where the eponymous hero asks for
an increase in his script from Mr Bumble the workhouse counsellor? 'More?'
he roars. 'The boy wants more?!' Things haven't changed much and dose
levels still provide a neat divide between patient and professional drug
worker. The area is so sensitive that a sympathetic prescriber interviewed
for the Big Issue in 1994 was (mis) quoted as allowing patients to 'dictate
their scripts.' A hasty apology drew attention to the doctors habit of
allowing patients input into their script levels rather than deciding
the dose but lawyers for the Home Office were
Already preparing to use the piece as part of a prosecution for 'irresponsible
prescribing'. As far as Heroin is concerned, the root of all the problem
lies with the old misconception that 1mg of methadone = 1mg of diamorphine
(heroin). It cannot be overstressed how inaccurate this equation is. Over
a 24 hour period a cautious conversion would be 1mg of methadone = 3mg
diamorphine (I think 1:4 is closer).
All
prescribing initiatives rely on finding the right dose level for the individual
in question. However, the two experiemntal research protocols on diamorphine
over the last 25 years in the UK, have loaded the dice heavily against
a successful outcome for Heroin. Hartnoll and Mitcheson at University
College Hospital in the 1970's, used an average heroin dose of just over
40mg daily (?!) and Chelsea and Westminsters recent experiment again relied
on a 1:1 equivalence with methadone for dose assessment (ceiling a very
low 200mg daily). Diamorphine is expensive (although cheap in the scheme
of things) and politically sensitive but it is the drug of choice option
that is arbitrarily granted (in sufficient doses) to far too few.
Black Poppy would be interested to hear from anyone whose experienced
using the drugs/treatment/prisons, etc of other countries, we could all
do with a bit of drug advice when thinking of travelling. Drop us a line
Being on diamorphine (I have since switched from the cigarettes to injectables)
has made a big difference to the quality of my life. Productivity, mood,
energy, and libido are all active ingredients that I had lost on methadone
and pills. The Home Office feels that heroin should be prescribed with
extreme caution as users are likely to sell their supplies. If anyone
can tell me why I would want to swap a legal, free, clean, regular supply
for money to buy an illegal, expensive, adulterated bag from a dealer
with the added dimension of arrest, rip off or infections, I would suggest
they go and see their local consultant psychiatrist..........
Gary Sutton
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The
doctor seemed relieved, he removed his half moon specs and handed the
small pink form across the table. I hesitated, then lent forward and accepted
it. Suddenly, I was the lottery winner - or a long term jobbing actor
turned Oscar nominee winning the admiration of his peers, the goal he
had worked for and craved more than any amount of money or boundless love.
I clutched my new prescription to my bosom. I felt a speech coming on.
This," I said " is the happiest day of my life". My audience
- the consultant, a keyworker and a student with a stutter were so affected
by this announcement they produced an impromptu synchronised shoe inspection
and a nervous smile. I noticed the doctor had no socks on. I left them
still staring at the floor as I floated out the door. I caught the pure
euphoria of heroin forever and I sensed the old life receding. Bye bye
powder power and 'I'm so grateful to be kept waiting in cold carparks
to unload my giro in support of your habit Mr Dealer'. Goodbye sick days
and slow dawns yawning in the morning.
The
taxi office brought me back to reality. Situated just opposite the clinic
next to a bankrupt drycleaner it was an 8x10 gas chamber. Strapped into
the chair was a plump scouser scoffing what seemed like a last supper
and smoking ten fags simultaneously. 'I'm on drugs and it's fucking legal!'
I wanted to tell him. However the code of silence to which I'd adhered
to for years censored the impulse. I couldn't see him sharing my excitement.
The cab came, the road roared by until every traffic light saw us coming
and conspired to delay my arrival at the pharmacy.
Between
the idea and the reality, Between the motion and the act, Falls the shadow
(T.S Eliot).
Life
on heroin maintenance for me was not the instant consummation of desire
I expected. From the nipple to the bottle never satisfied. Initially I
opted for diamorphine reefers (supporters of heroin prescribing should
always refer to heroin as diamorphine as it has more medical and less
sensational connotations, particularly for the media). Diamorphine 'reefers'
(dig the hipster parlance!) are not popular with the medical establishment.
The 'medistab' are a queer mob. A weighty work could be written about
the amazing dynamic of the addict/doctor relationship. (A much thinner
volume on 'What doctors understand about drug addiction', would make less
rewarding reading). In case readers believe they can perceive bias in
these words, I will add that prescribers are on a hiding to nothing in
this field. You are only as good as your last 'script as far as most addicts
are concerned. Talk, as they never say in counseling sessions, is cheap
In a perfect world doctors believe they would not have to prescribe because
people wouldn't need drugs. In a perfect world most addicts believe they
would not need prescriptions because prohibition would not exist (and
genetically engineered opium poppies/coca leaves would grow in Elysian
fields behind the cannabis factory). So the clinics have done no evaluation
on smokable heroin (one excellent essay - 'Chasing the Dragon' by Gossop/Strang
appears in 'The British System' Oxford University Press 1996). As a consultant
once said to me " We don't in all conscience feel that we can condone
handing out a product that is actively carcinogenic". As the vast
majority (so it seems) of opiate addicts also smoke this seems a question
of the clients needs being subjugated to a dubious ethical absolute. At
my last place of employment, out of a random sample of 77 clients, 72
smoked and 2 had 'just given up'. As long term addicts go, our caseload
would, I suggest, be very typical.
Once
I was 'stablilised' on reefers (ie; I had been on the prescription one
month), I found other ciggies unsatisfactory and cut my 'non medical'
smoking down to 2 or 3 fags daily. An overall reduction of around 40%
- an unexpected bonus that might complicate the ethical equation. After
18 months, I felt that the reefers failed on two fronts. The transition
from the needle can be a complicated journey. I began to miss the 'rush'
that concerted accumulation of relief that follows a fix and the ritual
that precedes it. I began to feel I was being cheated. Somehow I just
wasn't getting stoned to order. Smoke one fag - nice, smoke two
used to.
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